


Say You Need Me

by vividzombie



Category: Skrillmau5, skrillex/deadmau5 - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Mpreg, Yaoi, say you need me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-21
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2017-12-15 17:05:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/851920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vividzombie/pseuds/vividzombie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A drunken night together that neither can remember begins to bring together Sonny and Joel, and lets not forget their new little bundle of joy! A Skrillmau5 story. Warning: BoyxBoy, and I do not own Sonny or Joel. They belong to eachother. Mpreg and major smut. Enjoy! :3</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Late night confessions

Sonny shivered, even in his new leather jacket the cold winds of Toronto nipped at the exposed skin his jacket didn't quite cover. He jammed his finger into the doorbell for the third time, silently cursing Joel for being a lazy prick and making him wait.

Sonny could hear some shuffling on the other side of the door and was soon greeted with the sight of the man he was just beginning to think had drifted off into a parallel universe. Pushing past him, Sonny let himself into Joel's new apartment, taking his shoes off once he was safely through the door and out of the harsh conditions of Canada in the middle of October.

Joel rubbed his eyes and rested them on the sight of his best friend making himself comfortable among the boxes scattered around his living room. He noticed Sonny had brought along with him a 12 case of Miller Light. 'Probably to celebrate my new status as single.' Joel scoffed in his head mentally rolling his eyes.

It had been about two months since him and Kat had broken up, and he was long over it, but it seems Sonny had just now gotten the news. Joel took a seat next to Sonny on his couch and accepted the beer Sonny handed to him.

He watched as his best friend chugged the beer like it was water to him. Sonny always knew just what to bring to lighten the mood. "Hey mang, we need to talk…" Came the hesitant chirp of Sonny's voice as he looked down at where his hand had clasped his bottle till his knuckles were white.

"Okay, shoot." Joel took another swig and closed his eyes. He knew whenever Sonny used that voice it usually meant big news and he just wanted to get it out of the way so he could go back to working on his latest single.

"Do you remember that show we did in New York? The one where we went to that after party and got so shit faced we couldn't even remember what hotel you were in so we just went back to mine?" Sonny fiddled with his fingers clasped on his bottle, obviously nervous.

Joel could see the apprehension on Skrill's face and turned more towards him so he could look into his baby brown eyes, so full of innocence. God he'd never seen a more beautiful face. Even when he was dating Kat he always had a thing for Sonny.

Of course he never told anyone. It was his little secret and his alone. For when it was the dead of night and he couldn't get the feeling of fingers ghosting across his neck as sonny threw an arm around him nonchalantly, or the feeling of his heat radiating so close to him, Joel would cave and slip a hand under his covers to press against that aching piece of flesh. Flesh that wanted and craved something that was forbidden, it ached for Sonny.

So Joel kept his little secret, covering it up with Kat. She was pretty enough to keep his attention and he hoped that with the engagement he could move on and forget what could never be.

That was until he came home one evening to find her stuffing his suitcase full of his stuff and upon being noticed in the doorway he was screamed at for 'Not treating her properly' and 'She deserved better so he should just leave and take his stupid cats with him!'.

The first thought that came to his mind was Sonny, and his cute little smile he would give Joel to cheer him up.

Joel shook his head to get rid of the memory and realized he had zoned out on what Skrill's was saying only catching the last part of the sentence. "… I think we had sex." Sonny mumbled, quickly casting his eyes down towards the floor, teeth worrying at his snake bites.

"… Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait, What?" Joel was taken aback. He could barely remember the night Sonny was mentioning. He could remember it was about a week before he had asked Kat to marry him and he was performing a show with sonny.

He remembered the slurred voice as Sonny pushed him into the back of his limo with a whispered command of, "Spend the night with me." Before Sonny leaned forward and crushed their lips together.

He could remember the taste of nicotine and whatever drink sonny just had, on his lips and it made that little piece of him that wanted sonny to throb and curl low in his chest.

Joel ached to remember what happened after that moment but everything was blank with the feeling of vodka haze clouding his brain.

"I think we had sex that night." Sonny repeated. He still wouldn't look up from the floor, ashamed maybe? Joel couldn't tell. "How do you know?" Joel inquired; this was all one big mess he had gotten himself into again.

"Well I hadn't been feeling well lately so I went to the doctor and they said I'm pregnant…" Sonny squeezed his eyes shut tight so he didn't have to see the look of confusion on his best friends face. He still didn't quite understand it himself.

Joel's face was frozen. 'Pregnant? How did that even happen? They were both guys, for Christ sake!' He was so confused right now, he could only hope Skrill's would explain everything but as the seconds ticked by it looked like there would be no explanation.

"Why does this matter to me?" Joel asked quietly, almost as if he were to speak to loud would make everything true. "It's yours." Sonny whispered before flopping his head down expertly onto Joel's lap hoping to find comfort in his best friend while he let the tears slip down his face.

"Are you going to leave me alone in this?" Skrillex had to whisper after nothing was said upon his confession. He was deathly afraid that he would be left alone in this deal. He had no idea how to raise a child, let alone by himself! Sonny desperately needed help in this endeavor.

"Of course not… I could never leave you alone… It is partially my fault were in this mess in the first place." Joel leaned back on his couch and ran his fingers through Sonny's hair hoping to calm his friend. Soon Sonny's tears stopped and with the help of the soothing motions of Joel's hands through his hair it shortly put him to sleep.

Joel watched as Sonny's breathing evened out and was followed by cute shallow snores. Picking him up bridal style he carried Skrill's to his- now their bedroom. Laying him down gently he kissed him quickly on the head before leaving to continue his work. He would sort this all out when Sonny woke up and then they would begin planning their new life, _together._


	2. The Morning After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MAJOR SMUT! BEWARE!

Chapter 2

Sonny woke up to the feeling of silk sheets and an arm around his waist, heat radiating from where he presumed Joel had crawled in bed with him. He hummed and sunk deeper into those arms, content with the moment, as he let a smile grace his lips.

Joel pulled Sonny tighter to him, leaning over to glance at his face to check if he was awake. "What're you smilin' at so early?" Joel mumbled, taking a moment to rub the sleep out of his eyes before leaning down to place chaste kisses at Sonny's neck. He could feel Sonny stiffen before letting out a small gasp.

They still hadn't talked about the night before or what they were going to do or what any of this meant, even though Sonny knew what it meant for him, Joel was a whole other story. He was a mystery to Skrill's and that only made him want Joel more.

Joel untangled himself from the bed and the tempting sight of Sonny laying in it, his hair disheveled and his lips moist from where he watched his best friend dart his tongue out to swipe across them invitingly, He had to shake his head to clear his thoughts.

'Cold shower, coffee, talk.' Joel muttered to himself like a personal mantra as he went about his daily routine. When he was fully clothed and sitting at his kitchen table, steaming mug in hand, Sonny decided to walk out of his bedroom clad in nothing but the overly large hoodie Joel had worn yesterday. He had to bite his lip and glanced down to keep himself from reaching out and pushing everything off his table and taking sonny right then and there. He really needed to get these feelings under control, they were the reason they were in this mess in the first place. Besides he was straight anyway, right? He shouldn't be having these feelings for his best friend.

While Joel was mentally berating himself, Sonny was able to pour himself a bowl of cinnamon toast crunch and seat himself across from Joel, fully focused on devouring the cereal. Neither of them knew what to say to start off the conversation they both desperately needed to have.

'Joel, I…" Sonny started but was cut off when Joel reached across the table to take Skrill's hand in his looking him straight in the eyes. Words rushed out of Joel's mouth before it was to late, "Sonny this is my fault and I take full responsibility and I want to help you take care of it, if you decided to keep if of course, I want to be in its life and see this out to the end. It's the least I could do." Sonny was touched, to say the least.

He knew that Joel was only staying because he felt guilty, but really he shouldn't have to. Sonny owed it to him to let him know what was going on but he shouldn't feel like he had to stay just because he was dumb and hadn't used protection. Granted he was smashed off his ass, but that's beside the point.

"Joel, you shouldn't stay just because you feel guilty. I want you to have a life. Go out and party and meet people and fall in love…" Sonny trailed off, glancing down to where he was fiddling with his fingers. "I promised you I wasn't leaving you alone and that's exactly what I'm doing. This child is mine too and God damn it I'm going to be a part of its life!" God Sonny could be so stubborn sometimes.

He watched as his best friends eyes filled with tears and quickly reached out to drag Skrill's onto his lap so he could brush his tears away. "Shh, shh. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell, I'm just frustrated. It's a lot to take in, you know?" Sonny's tears slowed down to just quiet sniffles as he calmed down. "I know. It's still kind of shocking to me too. To think there's this little life in me, you don't know how terrified I am." Skrill's confessed. "It's okay, because I'm terrified too. I'm going to be such a terrible father…" Joel replied dejectedly.

"Don't you dare say that! We are going to be amazing parents and raise the fuck out of our child!" Sonny grabbed his best friends face and pulled him for a brutal kiss, teeth clicking angrily against each other as noses smashed together awkwardly. It wasn't romantic at all, it was full of need and desperation and want; A want that Joel shouldn't have but couldn't stop from curling deep in his stomach.

Eyes wide with shock, it took Joel a moment to respond, eyes slipping closed he parted his lips, snaking his tongue out to ask permission into Skrill's mouth. Letting out a small gasp, Sonny parted his lips just enough to give him access to what he knew they both wanted, the kiss turning languid and smooth, fear melting as the realization that they were in this together began to sink in.

The slight touch of stubble and snake bites against his face was definitely new to Joel, but a good kind of new he decided as he weaved his hands into Sonny's hair tugging lightly to get a better angle at his lips. Picking Sonny up by the waist Joel stumbled into his bedroom, his best friends legs wrapped around his waist, lips never once breaking the kiss.

Skrill's grunted as he was plopped down onto the bed but it was replaced with a moan as Joel attacked his neck with playful nips, crawling on top to straddle his waist. Sonny watched with lidded eyes as Joel took the hem of his shirt and lifted it over his head before starting on Skrill's next. 'Oh god, this is happening. This is really, really happening.' Sonny bit his lip nervously, whilst arousal washed over him with the anticipation of what Joel was going to do to him.

Joel kissed down Sonny's chest only stopping to suck a pink nipple into his mouth, being rewarded with a soft gasp as sonny tangled his fingers in Joel's short hair. "Joel, don't teaaase…" Sonny whined, his breath beginning to come faster as Joel rubbed the flat of his tongue across his nipple.

Head thumping back on the pillow, Joel watched as Sonny became undone piece by piece just from his hands. If this was the reaction he got so far he couldn't wait to see how far he could push his best friend before Sonny finally tumbled off that cliff into that complete white bliss.

Reaching down he cupped Sonny through his boxers, extremely grateful Sonny decided to not put pants on this morning, as he watched him arch his back, eyes slipping shut as his tongue came out to lick and bite at his full lips trying to shush himself.

Slipping his hand into Sonny's boxers he began to stroke him slowly, His breath ghosts along the cock in his hands, and he mewls low in the back of his throat at just how much he wants to fuck him already. Slipping his hand up Skrill's side he pushes three fingers into his mouth with a growled command of, "Suck." And Sonny did just that. Laving and moaning around the fingers like they were the best things he's tasted all day.

Deciding they were wet enough Joel glides the slick fingers down Sonny's body, coming to rest them right where he knew Sonny need them. While his fingers circle Skrill's hole, already clenching from pleasure Joel pushes one finger in to the first knuckle, crooking it slightly so he won't get pushed out.

Sonny mewls at that, and it's the most delicious sound he thinks he's ever heard – his best friend is purring like a kitten for him, spreading his legs and bucking his hips and Joel thinks he might just come, just from fingering his little goblin.

Joel slides his finger in a little deeper, stretching Sonny's hole out as best he can while he has a handful of his goblin, and he pulls his other hand away from balancing himself on the mattress, puts all his weight on his legs and fists the base of Sonny's cock, forming a tight ring for him to fuck into.

Sonny's close and Joel can tell. He pulls his fingers out, flipping sonny onto his stomach and spits on his palm, slicking himself up. Joel got rid of his own clothing ages ago, and so when he slides in, it's perfect skin against glorious heat.

Skrill's grips him like a vice, still so tight after so much preparation, and he fits around him like a glove that's one size too small. Joel moans, his chest rubbing along Sonny's bowed back, forming himself perfectly against the curve of his lover's pleasure-seized body. They both moan when he bottoms out.

They stay like this for a moment, Joel giving Sonny time to adjust to the feeling of being completely filled with him. He pulls out and slams back into his little goblin, groaning low in his throat, because even in his wildest imaginings he never believed it could have been this good.

"Joel…" Sonny reaches back and digs his long fingers into Joel's ass, urging his friend back inside of him.

Joel smirks. "You're such a little slut for it, aren't you?" he growls, but obeys Sonny's needy request and thrusts back into him, building up a slow, harsh rhythm, rearing back so he can get a good look at Sonny – his Sonny. "All flushed and panting and just begging for my cock."

"Yes, Joel…yes, fuck…" Sonny's hair is plastered to his face and neck, face set in an expression of ecstasy as he tries to look back and see his lover, and his eyes are bright and hazel when they meet Joel's deep blue. Sonny moans at the sight. "Joel, please…"

"Please, what, Sonny? What do you need?" Joel asks, smirking.

Sonny whines again, and fuck, Joel might just come at that – at seeing his Sonny, reduced to such an animal just by being fucked. Joel quickens his pace, because he knows he's not going to last long.

Sonny cries out – screams, more like – and his whole body convulses, wrenching Joel's orgasm from him just as Joel draws out Sonny's. All Sonny can feel is heat and fire and love, and it feels like coming home.

Joel slumps forward to weak to stand on wobbly knees, pressed firmly against the curve of his goblins back, panting hard as he came down from his high. Rolling over they lay cuddled together, sated and content, Skrill's head resting on Joel's chest while an arm wrapped tightly around him.

There's a touch so gentle that it's like it's not even there, so gentle that it doesn't register at first, against his forehead, a pair of lips that caress against his heated skin. That's the last thing Sonny feels before he gives into the blackness pulling at his mind.


	3. Love is such an odd feeling

Chapter 3

Waking up next to Sonny tucked in his arms was beginning to become Joel's favorite part of the day. Sure he got to watch Sonny attempt to make breakfast and lunch and dinner, and giggle when he came across a particularly funny picture on the internet, and just be insanely cute all hours of the day, slowly bringing out the affectionate side of Joel when he saw his little goblin like this.

But holding him in the silent morning was completely different. It allowed for a stronger, gentler emotion to come forward. He knew what it was -for he thought he had felt it with Kat before- and the fact that it had developed so quickly was enough to make Joel worry. Sonny had only been living with him for 3 days and it already felt like he was meant to be here forever.

'Maybe when the baby comes he'll decide to move in for good?' Joel aimlessly wondered as he ran a hand through his goblins black hair leaning in to nuzzle the pale neck in front of him. He was rewarded with a quiet moan, soft enough to have been lost in the silence if Joel hadn't been listening for it.

Sonny's eyes fluttered opened at the feeling of fingers in his hair and damp breath at the back of his neck and his stomach rolling like it was on a roller coaster. Shooting up out of the bed he rushed to make it to the toilet before unloading last night's spaghetti Joel had attempted to make. Barley dropping to his knees before his head was in the toilet, arms gripped around it like a lifeline.

It wasn't long until Sonny felt comforting hands rub his back and hold his hair as he emptied the contents of his stomach.

"You okay, Goblin?" Joel asked affectionately, leaning down to nuzzle the back of Sonny's neck in a comforting motion as he watched Skrill's catch his breath.

"This child is going to be the death of me…" Sonny whined as he leaned back into Joel's warm, solid chest. They lay there for a couple minuets just enjoying the support each other has to offer, only moving when the grumble of empty stomachs motivates them into making breakfast.

Sitting at the table Sonny leans back and rubs at his stomach, the slight bump there barely noticeable unless touched. He had to have been a little over 2 months, which is appropriate; since that was when the incident had happened.

Joel heard Sonny sigh at the table and looked over. He sat back, a hand on his stomach slightly rubbing. Skrill's was barley showing but the thought that soon he would be, and that it was his child sent a thrill of excitement through Joel.

After breakfast was finished Joel kissed Sonny's head and climbed the stairs up to his studio to work on his latest album, leaving his little goblin to his own devices for the moment. He was up there for 30 minutes before the sound of pleased mewls and someone panting harshly caught his ear.

"Oh he's not…. Is he?" Joel wondered aloud heading downstairs to investigate. There on his couch sat Sonny, naked except for the pants around his ankles, one hand on his cock the other disappearing between his legs to pump furiously inside him. "Oh he so is." Joel smirked, a devilish thought crossing his mind and capturing his attention. Walking down the rest of the steps he stopped just behind the couch out of Sonny's line of sight careful to not let him be seen.

Leaning over the couch Joel took a fist full of his goblins hair yanking back harshly. A moan was ripped from Sonny's mouth as neither of his hands stopped their actions.

"Joooooel…" Sonny moaned eyes half lidded as his tongue coming out to swipe at his full bottom lip invitingly, back arching as he rubbed a finger harshly across his prostate. Indulging in the request Joel leaned down to press his lips over his goblins upside down ones. Kissing him slowly Joel reached into the end table next to the couch for the vibrator he had stashed there one day Kat was over.

"As much as I love watching you take care of yourself, why don't you let the pro help you?" Joel whispered into his goblins ear nipping at an earlobe before removing Skrillex's fingers from himself to place the vibrator inside, watching with wide eyes as the toy slipped inch by inch into his Sonny.

Eyes slipping shut Sonny grabbed onto the couch, knuckles turning white, as he arched his back when the toy was rammed into his prostate. Joel flipped his wrist turning it on enjoying in the way his little goblin screamed his name when the toy began shaking and bumping sweetly against the spot that made stars dance behind Sonny's closed lids.

Teasingly slow Joel pulled it out watching the way Skrill's hole puckered and stretched around the fake cock, only for him to ram it back into that spot over and over and over. Shaking and sweating Sonny could feel heat coiling in his stomach.

"Please, Joel. I'm so close! I need… I ne-eed you." Sonny cracked his lids enough to look into the blue of his lovers eyes filled with lust and something else. Something Sonny couldn't quite place his tongue on.

Taking pity on his little goblin all flushed and panting and just begging for release, Joel angled the vibrator on Sonny's sweet spot holding it there and pulled sharply on the hair still in grasped in his hands. The constant assault on his prostate combined with the rough display of dominance was enough to have Sonny cumming with a shout of his lover's name; releasing his load all over his heaving chest, hand still furiously pumping his cock until he had milked himself dry.

Slowing down and turning of the vibrator Joel chucked it into the table he found it at. Choosing to lean over the couch and picking his goblin up bridal style to continue this in the bedroom. Skrillex was limp in his arms, head lolling from side to side as Joel carried him.

Once reaching the destination Joel laid him on the bed, crawling on top of the man before him. Eyes half lidded Joel snapped his hip forwards, grinding his cock against Sonny's bare one. The only reaction he got was Sonny's little snores.

'That little fucker fell asleep on me!' Joel yelled inside his mind. On the outside though he could only sigh and roll off his goblin, throwing an arm over his face. The other arm snaked its way down his torso to undo his tight jeans.

Slipping his hand inside he fished out his erection, grasping it in his hand he began sliding from base to tip. Joel whimpered at the sensation sucking his full bottom lip into his mouth he stifled the noises that were streaming from his mouth, worried about waking Sonny up.

Rolling his hips again he couldn't help from fucking his hand, imagining it was Sonny. It wasn't too long before he came all over his chest and hand, touching all the right spots to get him off the quickest and hardest. Not to mention the sight, smell, and touch of Sonny's body down the side of his right next to him was enough to push him over; that little coil in the pit of his stomach tightening and then exploding in pleasure.

Panting harshly Joel relaxed into the bed, rolling over and cuddling Sonny close, an arm thrown over the naked chest found there. A warm fuzzy feeling wormed its way inside of Joel's chest and in his dazed and content state he lay there too tired to contemplate it, choosing instead to follow his goblin into the bliss that is sleep.

Upon waking up Joel found an empty bed still warm from where Sonny had slept moments before. Panicking he jumped up out of bed fixing the pants he had slept in as he stumbled down the hallway to the living room, hoping to find him watching a Disney movie he had watched a thousand times already.

But Joel was greeted with nothing. Checking the kitchen, he discovered a note written in Sonny's sloppy hand writing.

"Gone to the doctors. Don't flip out mang, I'll be back soon it's just a checkup. Bringing home Chinese. ~Love, Sonny."

Joel heart flipped in his chest at the word "Love", causing a blush to grace his face. 'Do I love sonny?' The question flew across the front of Joel's mind only to burn a lasting impression there. His heart throbbed at the question answering in a silent yes.

Revealing in the realization Joel's world was suddenly clear. 'I love Sonny.' Were the words spoken in his head too shy to announce it out loud afraid it would become all too real to quick. While Joel was mulling about in his feelings and thoughts he didn't hear the front door open.

Strolling in Sonny set down the take out he had brought back along with a cheerful smile gracing his lips as he walked up behind Joel, wrapping his arms around the thin waist and leaned up to place chaste kisses to the back of the tattooed covered neck.

"Mmm. 'm home." Skrill's spoke between kisses as Joel turned around to greet him properly. Surprising his goblin Joel picked him up and spun him around once in a wide circle, setting a giggling Sonny down afterwards.

"How'd your check up go? Everything healthy and what not?" Joel asked kissing Skrill's forehead as he went to grab a plate of Chinese food, Sonny following suit.

"Went real good man. Doctor gave me some pills to keep me healthy, but all in all he said that she was a healthy weight and they I should be due in April." Sonny nodded his head along as he spoke, loading his plate full of everything until it looked like a mountain about to crumble.

"Wait, she?" Eyebrows shooting up almost reaching his short hairline, Joel was stunned at this information. He was going to have a daughter. A daughter!

"Yeah, they took pictures today. Here," Handing over a folded and slightly crumpled piece of paper, Sonny scooted closer cuddling under the arm Joel had thrown over the back of the couch, so they could look at the photo together.

Also so Skrill's could see the look on mau5's face when he saw their daughter for the first time. But he wasn't going to mention that. Shoulders slumping as Joel shifted his arm down to curl around his goblins small frame as he gazed as his child for the first time, his other hand coming over to rest automatically on Skrillex's stomach petting absent mindedly as he looked in admiration at the photo in Sonny's hand.

Inspiration struck, and Joel knew exactly how he was going to sweep sonny off his feet. Bending down Joel scooped his goblin up quickly cradling him close to his chest as he rushed to the bedroom. Sonny screamed the whole way clutching onto Joel's shirt as he was jostled with the sudden change in state.

Plopping both of them onto the silk sheets of Joel's king sized bed he pulled Sonny against his chest just laying there holding him. No words were said because Sonny knew what Joel was trying to say without any words. They were just that close. Drifting in and out of consciousness the last thing Sonny felt was a warm body pressed reassuringly against his back letting him know Joel wasn't going anywhere for a long, long time.


	4. Down the rabbitt hole we go

Chapter 4

Claws slipping up his neck Sonny chokes in a shuddering breath as he feels the monster squeeze warningly, giving him a taste of the strength he had over Sonny. Glowing red eyes ooze a crimson liquid Sonny refuses to acknowledge as blood choosing instead to glance at the round ears of the mock mau5 head that Joel wears on stage.

Oh how he wanted desperately to believe the head was ceramic and that it was just Joel playing a prank but by the way those eyes were watching him; a tongue coming out to slip across the razor sharp teeth in the beast's mouth, Sonny could tell that this monster meant business.

Eyes slipping shut Sonny thought of the family that would be taken away from him, when the monster achieved his goal, a single tear rolling down his cheek in despair for them. He could hear the click of the monsters teeth as his jaw opened up wide ready to perform the final kill, silencing Sonny for good.

BANG, BANG, BANG!

Shooting up out of bed, Sonny screams and convulses, legs trapped in the blanket and under Joel's weight. Tears flowed freely down his face as Joel sat up next to him, hugging his little goblin close to his chest as he wiped away the tears. The sun streaming in through the shades burned their newly awakened eyes.

"Shh, Shhh. It's okay. Someone's just at the door. You're fine, I'm here; Shhh." Joel rocked Sonny back and forth trying to comfort him the way his mother used to comfort himself when he would wake up from the thunder booming over head late at night.

"Joooooel, don't leave... Please never le-eeaave me." Sonny's voice was a soft whisper that cracked at the end as more tears flooded down his face.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"Joel Open up! I'm freaking out man! I can't get a hold of Sonny! Have you seen him? He's not answering his phone!"

"Roadhog? Is that you?" Joel calls down the hall, unwilling to leave his Goblin for even one second.

"Yeah, have you seen Sonny? Please tell me you've seen him. I've checked everywhere!"

"You going to be okay for five seconds while I go talk to hog?" Joel whispered looking into Sonny's eyes. Only getting up and putting on the pants he found on the ground, when Skrillex gave a shy nod lying back down and curling around the blankets Joel had just evacuated, breathing in the smell of smoke and something that was distinctly Joel. Joel couldn't help but think Sonny looked fuckin' adorable and small, all cocooned up in his bed, in his blankets. The beast in his chest purred at that small victory.

A feeling of possession and ownership slipped into his chest right under his sternum and curled hotly there for a moment, while he gazed at his Sonny. Dragging his gaze up from his Goblin, Joel noticed the marks behind the headboard fluffing his pride a bit as well.

Heading down to the front door clad in nothing but the skinny's that he had hastily shimmied off last night before bed, Joel opened the door greeted with the worried face of Sonny's manager.

"Calm your tits, dude. Sonny's fine. He's in my room right now." Down the hall the sound of the shower running could be heard as Skrillex discovered Joel's master bathroom.

"Why the fuck didn't he call me then?! God, I've been running around for 3 days looking for that little twerp!" Pushing his way inside the Hog slumped onto the hospital white couch pushed off the side of the living room centered directly in front of the plasma screen on the pasty white walls.

"I don't know. We've been busy lately."

"…We? Do I smell a new single coming on?" The Roadhog eyes lit up as the words left his mouth. A new single with mau5 could open up so many doors and the fans had been hounding him lately to get Skrillex and mousy into the studio, and some of the more hard core fans trying to get them into bed together but eh what can you do? Girls are crazy creatures.

"New single? Who's making a new single?" Skrillex stood in the door way clad in nothing but a pair of fresh black skinny's, much like how Joel was, hair dripping and shoved under a beanie.

The sight of him caused Joel's heart to lurch in his chest thumping hollowly against his ribcage. No matter how many times he had looked at Sonny before every time it took his breath away, he was always breathless when it came to his goblin. Even before all this fucked up shit happened.

Did he even mean anything to Sonny? I mean sure he was carrying his child and what not but were there any feelings behind any of it? Did Sonny want a relationship? Did he want marriage? Hell Joel had a hard enough time wrapping his mind around the fact that he could be gay.

He had never liked another guy before, it had always been chicks. Maybe it was just a Sonny thing? 'Yeah, that makes more sense' Joel mentally settled in the black hole that is his mind. It was just a Skrillex thing; after all he had always had a soft spot for the boy.

In the time that Joel had spaced out, lost in his whole mental war with himself in trying to understand the hungry beast that had decided to gnaw at his inside's; lodged deep inside his chest at every stupidly cute thing he did, Sonny had crossed over to Rob. Sitting next to him on the white couch, they were both hunched over looking intently at the Roadhog's laptop whispering quickly to one another.

Sonny's hair dripped a steady stream of water onto the glass coffee table, looking like the inky tendrils of Joel's chuthulu tattoo. Both Rob and Sonny never once looked up at him, to absorbed in what he assumed was them making plans, as he went into the nearby kitchen to grab an early lunch.

"Tonight? Isn't that a little short notice?"

"Nah mang, the fans love this secret last minute stuff. All you gotta do is tweet about it and the most dedicated fans nearby will come out. And there is the neatest little bar like right down the street that I already talked to, has a nice stage and everything. It'll be perfect!"

"I don't know dude. I'm not sure I'm really feeling well enough to go out and do a show today…"

"You look fine to me. Listen, you just up and left the face of the earth for 3 days! Do you have any idea what that did to your image? We need to start getting you out there and doing gigs again… besides the fans miss you."

" 'aight I guess tonight wouldn't be so bad. Joel can come too right?"

"Of course! Anything for my little buddy!"

Joel couldn't see their faces but from the sounds of their voices that drifted in through the open door connecting the kitchen and living room, Sonny wasn't thrilled. But the little goblin never liked disappointing his fans.

Strolling in through said mentioned open door, Sonny's face was down cast as he plopped himself into the seat across from Joel at the table, listening as Rob let himself out. The door echoing the slam throughout the house.

"Roadhog schedule you a gig?"

"Yeah, it's tonight. That little bar right up the road? It's there." Leaning forward Skrillex rested his forehead on the cold wood of the table, a sigh escaped his lips.

"You don't want to go or something? I thought you loved shows?"

"I do! It's just sometimes they can get crazy and drinking while pregnant is not a good Idea and I don't know if I could stop myself. Would it be too much for me to ask if you came with me? You know to help keep me sane and what not?" Peeking up from where his hair had fallen onto the table next to him Sonny could see Joel's lips pull back into a smirk, arms crossing over his chest defiantly.

"Depends; what would I be coming with you as?"

"What the fuck you talking about, mang?" Sonny's eyes scrunched up under his glasses in confusion. 'I swear sometimes Joel could be so fucking frustrating.'

"What would I be coming with you as? Concerned boyfriend? Best friend? Lover? Partner? What am I to you?

"I don't know dude! Boyfriend? Father of our child? You are what you've always been. You're my Joel."

Joel could see the splash of a blush coat Sonny's cheeks as he retreated behind his hair again, embarrassed at the display of his sentimental side. His lips stretched into a pleased grin as he stood up, crossed over to his goblin and picked him up bridal style, carrying him into the bedroom and plopping him down onto the bed ignoring his squeals of protest at "being carried like a woman".

"What are you doing, Mang?

"When do you need to be there tonight?"

"They need me there at seven for sound check. Why?"

"That means we have two hours for a nap, before I have to take my new boyfriend to his show." Rolling Sonny onto his side and slinging an arm over the waist presented to him, Joel leaned down to place chaste kisses to the back of Skrillex's neck. Enjoying the sharp intake of breath he was rewarded with.

Joel felt fingers slid in between the ones wrapped around Sonny's waist, only to rest them on the slight bump presented from Skrillex's stomach.

"You know Joel, of all the people for this to happen to me with, I'm glad it was you."

"Me too Skrilly, me too. Now go to sleep, you're going to be up late tonight."

Deep down into the black rabbit hole they spiraled together.


	5. Catch me if you can

Chapter 5

Eyes fluttering open, Sonny stretched his arms up, yawning as he blindly gropes for his glasses on the nearby end table. Knocking several things off in the process, Joel decides to intervene. Detangling his arm from around Skrillex's waist, he reaches over and plucks them from where they hang on the edge, in danger of toppling to the ground.

"Fuckin' blind goblins, and shit man."

Glasses perched across his nose; Sonny rolls himself out of the warm comfort of his bed, as Joel moans a protest. Groping blindly for his precious Skrillex, Joel is met with nothing but the left over heat. The shower is a distant murmur as he hears Sonny turn it on.

Sleeping pants stripped, Sonny appears in the door way out of the corner of Joel's supposedly still sleeping, eyes.

"There's room for two in the shower you know." Arms crossed over his chest, Skrillex blushes as Joel throws a lanky arm over his eyes, blocking the tempting sight.

"Yup. I'm coming."

Following Sonny into the master bathroom Joel strips slowly, knowing Sonny was watching with rapt attention, and steps under the warm spray letting it slowly wake him and relax his muscles.

Slipping in, Sonny's arms curl around Joel's waist, as he rest's his forehead on the smooth plane of Joel's back, watching the water cascade down and dip into every rivulet and crease. Reaching a tongue out Sonny catches a falling drop, licking a strip up the soft skin.

God, Everything about Joel was addicting to him. His voice caused shivers to lace up his spine in the best way, and those eyes, those honey brown eyes made him feel so loved he didn't know what to do. He knew their baby was going to have the most loving parents a child could wish for and with that thought a grin stretched across his lips.

Turning around Joel found Sonny beaming at him brightly, only to lean forward and connect their lips passionately. Melding together, even though the slight bump on skrillex's stomach kept them apart slightly, that didn't stop them from devouring each other's face like the world was ending.

Panting, they broke apart as Joel warped a large hand around both of them and tugged slow and lovingly at their lengths, watching the slide of skin against skin as pleasure coursed through their bodies. It was a testament to how far gone they were when it only took a hand full of pulls before Sonny was tumbling over that cliff into white bliss. Joel followed soon after painting a collage of white on their chests.

Standing in the aftermath of their mess they take turns standing under the shower head, each washing the other until the water turns cold and they are forced to leave.

The harsh wind of Toronto was chilling on Sonny's still wet hair as he and Joel walked hand in hand down the street to the bar that was going to be holding his last minute private show. Shivering, Sonny could only tuck himself in closer to Joel's side and curse his leather jacket for not being warmer as they stepped inside the building already packed with people moshing and raving as Zed warmed up the crowed.

"We should go let the hog know we're here."

"Can you go do that for me? I need a coke. I'll meet you back stage in 10 minutes, I promise."

Slipping his hand out of Joel's grasp Sonny took off weaving in and out of the crowd before Joel could even stutter a retort. Throwing an arm over the bump that was his daughter, to fend off any stray elbows, Sonny managed to make it to the other side of the room by the bar, looking only a little bit rumpled as he climbed a bar stool next to a hulking man covered in tattoos that only spoke of death and murder.

The man looked to be an impressive six foot two, with a buzzed head showing off the multiple scars he had no doubt won in bar fights and grizzly bear wrestles. He looked towards Skrillex as he pulled himself up onto the seat and ordered a coke, eyes mapping a path down his body only to land on the noticeable bulge protruding from Sonny's stomach.

Hurdling down the bar fly's Sonny's coke only to clink next to the strange mans drink.

"I'm sorry man, I should have caught that. My bad."

"It's 'aight."

The man's lips curled back in a cruel smirk as he watched Skrillex gulp the coke down. He had been watching him for some time now, laughing and hugging with that Deadmau5 fellow.

He was fairly certain that they were an item now, considering the way he saw them look at each other when they entered the room.

Tonight would be the night. The pill was already in place. All he had to do was sit back and watch as Sonny's world came crashing down around him.

Chuckling to himself he noticed Sonny's warm brown eyes were dulled as the sedative took effect. Throwing out his large arms he cushioned Sonny's impact into his chest and lifted him into his arms, carrying his prize out the back door.

No one paid any mind to the man carrying Skrillex away, all lost in their own universe of pleasure, nothing else mattered to them as long as the booze kept flowing and the bass kept dropping.


	6. Tangled up in tears

Chapter 6

Opening his eyes they are only met with more darkness and a splitting headache. Twisting from side to side he find he is also tied a chair, not a very comfortable chair might I add. Glancing around the room he takes in his surroundings.

Bright plush white bed pushed to the side, ebony curtains drawn shut, grand wooden door off to the corner, a flickering light hanging ominously over where he sat in the chair. It looks so much like the several late night hotels he's slept in on tour that the sudden memory only makes his headache throb worse.

He trembles softly as he feels something cold and smooth trace across his cheek. It feels pointy like a knife and when it pricks into the soft skin of his cheek Sonny begins to worry.

"My, my, my, what do we have here? A pretty little sparrow all wrapped up like a present just for me, and only me."

A sudden weight is places on Sonny's lap as his captor sits on him, the knife never leaving the spot on Sonny's face, leaning in to where he can smell the putrid breath still fresh with alcohol. Sonny begins to squirm and shout but the gag in his mouth is stifling and his arms sore from where they are tied to the back of the chair, rope digging into his delicate wrists.

He only stops when a deafening slap lands on his cheek causing his eyes to well up with unshed tears as his head is violently jerked to the side. Five red strips brandished across that pale cheek matching the attackers hand perfectly as they kiss upon that cheek.

"That's enough of that you little bitch! You're not going anywhere and no one's coming for you. Not even your precious little Deadmau5. You're worthless, garbage."

The tears rolled then, down quivering cheeks to caress along a defiant jaw; mocking almost. Soothing like a caress that he had come to know quite well lately, a caress that he will never feel again.

"From now on I will be the only one you need, the one you want, the one who will be everything to you forever."

An unwanted hand comes to grasp at the inky tendrils of Skrillex's hair. Tugging violently, he was forced to bare his neck to the world. He felt vulnerable and naked in this position. The collar of his black long-sleeved shirt slipping down to graze upon his collar-bone and expose more of the creamy skin.

Tears poured down like a thunderstorm raging against all the forces telling him to stop. That he can't show fear. That he needs to be strong, for Joel and for his daughter; still so small and innocent, nestled in his abdomen. Growing stronger as the days went by, he would find a way out of this for her sake.

Rough lips caressed against his exposed neck, mocking him. They were the same size, same texture, same everything. If he just closed his eyes maybe, just maybe, he could play along. Pretend they belonged to his lovers. In-between alternating harsh and gentle kisses the man speaks; coos more like, in a soothing manner against the stubble found at the base of Sonny's jaw.

"Say I'm yours. Say you need me. Say you belong to me, please… I just need you to love me that's all…"

The man's question is only met with silence as Sonny refuses because he doesn't need him or anyone else. He needs Joel. He needs his lover. He needs his boyfriend. He needs the father of his child. He needs his soul mate. And in that moment everything is clear.

The cascading waterfall down those rolling cheeks trickles dry as Sonny pulls himself together. Pulling and tugging, careful as to not alarm the man on his lap still peppering kisses down his throat, pausing to suck a deep bruise on his Adams apple; right on the front of his neck, marking him so the world can see that Sonny has no power against him. That he is a weak and defenseless.

Wriggling a finger under the ropes on his wrists Sonny is able to tug the knot free pulling his hands apart he doesn't move. Sits there and contemplates his next move. He has the element of surprise, he was a ninja in disguise and he had to time this perfectly for it to work.

Sonny watches the flickering light bulb above, casting most of the room in shadows. He could barely make out the outline of a wooden door in the corner of the room. One quick shove would all it be to drop the ass on his ass, and if he ran fast enough he could make it. He just needs to be fast.

'Blink once, twice, three times, go…'

Two hands fit firmly over a broad chest and began their duty, pushing as hard as he could Sonny took off. Jumping over the shocked mess on the floor, he was out the door before the man had even batted an eyelash hair tangling behind him like black smoke billowing in the breeze. Barreling down the dimly lit hallway Sonny recognized the place. He was at the Hilton Inn on North St. Just three blocks down the road from the bar.

Taking a sharp left Sonny fly's down the stairs, a steady thump thump thump of the man quick on his tail, elevators take to long and he was a man on a mission. Head cleared only one thought drifted into his mind, Joel and his daughter. They were his motivation. He needed to make it out. He had to live because he needed them like they needed him.

Feeling fingers slip through the inky tendrils of his hair flowing behind him, Sonny is then electrocuted with the feeling of his nerves singing in pain as he was jerked backwards into a waiting chest and lifted onto a shoulder.

Nails dug into the wall and teeth dug into the soft skin of whatever was closest as he fought tooth and nail to not lose. Losing meant failure and Sonny Moore was no failure.

When the door came into view Sonny squirmed harder only to be responded to with a tightening of arms as the door opened and closed with poor little Alice stuck in his rabbit hole just waiting for the white rabbit to show him the way out.


	7. Sweet sweet freedom

Chapter 7

Lights flash and blind Joel temporarily as he travels back stage to wait on a couch located just behind the main stage.

'Sonny should be back soon so I'll just chill here.' Joel mutters to himself as he takes a seat on the plush red couch backstage, grabbing a cold Coke found on the complimentary drink bar behind stage.

People pass and noises clash but there's still no sign of Sonny 20 minutes later and Rob is starting to pace back and forth and back and forth. It's starting to freak him out just a little bit. He tries to tell himself that the wetness on his palms is the sweating from the half drank coke can in his hand, but he can't lie to himself when it comes to his Sonny.

When it's time for Sonny's set and there is no Sonny for it; that's when it kicks Joel in the gut. Something is wrong. Something is very, very wrong. Skrillex never misses a set, ever. He loves his fans to much to disappoint them.

"Hey! Where is Skrills? I thought you said he'd be right back?"

"That's what he told me! I don't know where he is! I'm starting to freak out a little. We need to go out there and find him. Maybe he's stuck in the bathroom. Probably fell in the toilet, fucking goblin."

Marching out of the room Joel doesn't even look back to see if Rob is following him. He was a man on a mission. Sonny doesn't just disappear, he couldn't.

When Leoj slams the doors to the bathroom open, he's only met with the startled faces of two half naked guys up against the wall. They amble out the door, faces tinted pink as Joel scowers the stalls for signs of his boyfriend. When there was none Joel forces him to accept reality. Someone has taken his Sonny and his daughter.

He doesn't notice the salty tears building in his eyes until Rob ambles through the door way, eyes growing wide with shock.

"Rob you gotta help me. I think someone took Sonny. They took him Rob. They took him and my daughter and- and- and… I don't know what to do anymore. Please man, you gotta help me."

"It'll be alright dude. We'll find him, I promise."

Tied down tightly to the chair again, Sonny knows there is no escaping this time. The ropes dug into his wrists, securing him to what felt to him like an electric chair for he knew it would be the place he left this earth.

When he looks at his attackers face, Sonny can only see rage; pure, blind rage. It is the last thing he sees's before a palm the size of his face comes hurtling towards him, knocking him unconscious.

When he does awaken though he is no longer in the chair, but tied to the soft warm bed with another body wrapped around his, soundly sleeping and snoring lightly into the pillow. With a tug of his wrist Sonny notices that his attacker has gotten lazy with his knots and is easily able to slide his tiny wrists out of the poor knots.

Unwinding himself from the arm wrapped around his torso, Sonny slides out of the bed, stepping lightly across the carpet towards the door. Reaching his destination, he slowly opens and slides out of the room peeking to make sure the monster was still asleep.

Once outside Sonny walks quietly until he reaches the lobby and then bolts out of the hotel and down the streets, running the easy three blocks to Joel's apartment, adrenaline pumping through his blood. When he's finally standing outside the familiar door, Sonny's energy drains and he falls to his knees.

At first Joel ignores the thump outside his door, anxiously waiting by the phone for Rob's call. They had stayed out all night looking for the goblin and when day light came Rob made him go home with a promise that he would keep looking and call him if he found anything.

But it was when he heard the quiet sniffles that soon followed that thump made him question his sanity. They sounded like the sniffles he's heard a thousand times from his lover. Curiosity peaked; Joel crosses over to the door from where he was purched on his white couch next to his phone, blankly watching some silly Disney movie that Sonny had left on the DVR.

When he looks at the ground and see's his goblin there curled around himself Joel can't help but lean down and pick him up, curling Sonny close in his long arms as he buries his nose in wild black curls inhaling deeply the scent of his lover.

Laying him down on the couch Joel wraps them both in blanket after blanket as Sonny shivers against him and cries, the tears soaking into Joel's shirt. When Sonny's tears have stopped and He's snoring into Joel's throat, is when he calls the road hog and tells him the news of Sonny's return.

After refusing to let rob come over he hangs up and watches his goblin sleep. Taking in his soft features turned rough by the black eye swelling roughly on his right side and the scars already forming from slash marks on his cheeks and neck, Joel has to hold on tight to remind himself that this isn't a dream and that this beautiful creature is home and safe in his arms and that he would never let him out of his sight again no matter what.

He would find who did this and give them hell.


	8. Joel asks the tough questions

Chapter 8

The smell of bacon and eggs drift through Joel's house in the afternoon. He didn't want to leave Sonny alone bundled up in bed, hair messy and lips kissed red from when he couldn't help himself, but sadly his stomach was empty. It had been two days since he last ate; thoughts to focused on finding that piece that was taken from his home to even think about anything else.

Figuring Sonny hadn't eaten anything in two days either Joel decided it was time to make breakfast; which is how he found himself currently in the kitchen with a sleepy Sonny rubbing his eyes as he pads softly into the kitchen and curls himself around Joel's body to peer at the food as Sonny tucks his goblin hands into the pockets of Joel's comfortable, fuzzy sleep pants to keep his fingers warm from the AC nobody remembered to shut off last night.

"Mmm, Whatcha making? Better not be goth omelets again…" The low rumble of Sonny's morning voice causes Joel's heart to lurch painfully into his throat like it does anytime Sonny does something cute unconsciously.

"Dude you're like not even funny." Joel chuckles back. When Sonny leans up for a kiss Joel returns it softly until he hears the rumble of his goblins stomach, signaling that it was time to eat.

Curling up on the couch together with their food, Joel throws the blanket left forgotten there from last night, over their shoulders to escape from the freezing AC, and when Sonny turns on the little mermaid Joel doesn't even complain.

They sit eating and talking and watching Sonny's plate bump up from the kicks of their daughter; where it was rested on his stomach, when their daughter gave a particularly hard kick and when the plate falls off and onto Joel's lap well it just gives him a reason to cover his lover in left over bacon and eggs.

"JOEL! I can't believe you just did that! Seriously, mang? Not you gotta eat it, can't have you wasting food."

It's not until Sonny see's the predatory look in Joel's eyes that he knows he made a mistake. Bolting up out of his seat Sonny hobbles as fast as a 5 month pregnant man covered in eggs and bacon can, out of the living room and down the hallway to his and Joel's room. When he reaches the room he realizes the error of his ways, when he sees that now he is trapped.

Spinning around Sonny is met with Joel only mere feet away, eyes gleaming like a predator about to devour his prey. It takes two seconds for Sonny's feet to no longer be on the ground but instead each on the other side of Joel's legs, a very pleased looking Joel perched between Sonny's own legs.

Sonny's eyes close of their own accord as Joel leans in supporting his weight on his forearms, noses almost touching. He can feel their breath mingling and Sonny breaths him in because he missed him, so, so, much.

When Joel doesn't kiss him like he expects him to, Sonny cracks his eyes open just enough to look into those milk chocolate eyes half lidded like his own. They watch each other for a moment both just soaking in the feeling that they are alive and together finally.

Joel opens his mouth to speak but is caught off guard by a tongue darting into his mouth sliding over teeth and gums as Skrillex finally coaxes Joel's tongue to come out and play. Eyes slip shut as they breathe each other in, letting their senses fill with one another.

When they part and eyes slip open Joel knows he doesn't want anyone else. He wants this beautiful man, the father of his child, his best friend, to be his forever. He's been on such an emotional rollercoaster this past week so when he opens his mouth to speak Joel knows he's doing the right thing.

"Sonny, I love you. I love you so much you have no idea. Before all this happened, when Kat left me I was broken but then you came along and- and you fixed me. I know I don't say this a lot and I don't really show it but I don't know what I would do without you. I would be so lost. Because of you and our little daughter I feel like you've shown me a path and it leads to you and our family and I promise I will never let anything like this happen again. I love you."

Sonny was silent, listening carefully to everything Joel said; drinking it in, word after word. When Joel was done Sonny couldn't help but lean up and kiss him softly on the lips again, fingers slipping to grasp as the snort hair on the back of Joel's neck, carding through them gently.

"Joel I love you too. Don't you ever forget it, mang."

"Sonny, will you- HEY!"

Both look down to watch as a little foot was presented on the front of Sonny's belly right under where his shirt had ridden up and Joel slips his hands under the soft material. Running a finger down the sole of the foot they both watch with wide eyes as the foot disappears and then returns moments later.

"She must be ticklish just like her daddy." Sonny whispers as he watches Joel bond with their daughter.

"Naw mang, she definitely gets it from her mommy," Joel teases Sonny, "Have you thought about any names yet?" He whispers question forgotten, as he continues to tease the little foot outline presented to him with his pinky finger.

"Yeah I actually have. I was thinking something with a R. Like Rain; or something I don't know I just think it's kind of beautiful…"

"Rain… I like it; sounds exotic and unique. We can call her 'thunder' when she's angry." Joel chuckles but Sonny just gives him a look like 'if you call our daughter 'thunder' I will cut you.'

"Okay, Okay. But seriously goblin, what about middle names? And the last name? She's taking my last name right?" Sonny's eyebrows knit together as he contemplates the ideas rushing through his mind.

"Well for the middle name I like Violet. It just fits ya know? And as for last names why don't we just hyphen ours? It's not like were married or anything…" Joel watches as the corner of his goblins mouth turn down in a frown at the end of sentence.

"Sonny, what do you think about marriage anyway? Would it be something that you want, maybe not now but someday?" Joel tangles their fingers together and kisses each individual knuckle, eyes shut as he speaks.

"I don't know mang. I never really thought of myself as settling down and having a family but now that I'm here and with you I kind of want that life ya know? The whole picket fence, 2.5 kids plus a dog, kind of life…" They both watch as Sonny swipes the hand not held by Joel, in the air almost like he's painting the perfect picture for them.

"Maybe someday, Skrill's. Maybe someday…" Joel whispers as he watches Sonny's eyes flutter close, to tired to stay open anymore.

Reaching underneath them Joel pulls out the comforter and cocoons them in its fluff, placing a goodnight kiss on Sonny's lips and where the little indent of the foot has been replaced with a tiny hand outlined on his goblins swollen stomach.

"Good night Sonny… Good night Rain Violet Zimmerman-Moore… Sweet Dreams."


	9. The End Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A drunken night together that neither can remember begins to bring together Sonny and Joel, and let’s not forget their new little bundle of joy!

Chapter 9

-Three Months Later-

“Jooooel~” Sonny Whines as he attempts to reach the remote dropped on the ground, over his eight month pregnant belly. Rain had grown so much in the past month that Sonny had been forced into sweats and large shirts that Joel went out and bought when Sonny’s tummy couldn’t fit anymore.

Stepping into the room, Joel snorts as he watches his pregnant lover attempt to snatch the remote off the floor. Gliding over her easily bends and rescues the remote only to turn it over to Sonny, smiling as he is thanked before returning back into the kitchen to complete Sonny’s latest weird craving.

When Joel returns moments late with a peanut butter and banana sandwich in hand and Sonny is nowhere to be found, he begins to panic. Frantic, Joel searches his house for the missing goblin. Dread and apprehension spread through Joel’s chest like wild fire as the moment he realized Sonny was taken flashes through his mind.  
The feelings falter as he hears the water start up from the master bathroom and when he discovers a very pregnant naked Sonny struggling to enter the bath tub the feelings diminish completely.

“You dork. You almost gave me a heart attack; I thought you were gone. Let me help you with that.” Joel breath’s a sigh almost as if he were scolding a young child for running to far away as he enters the bathroom.

Caught off guard, Sonny’s head whips in the direction of the door way as his hands slip on the wet sides of the tub he was using to support his weight as he climbed in, and with a startled shout he’s tumbling into the deep tub. Head making a sickening crack sounds as he disappears under the water. Joel can only watch with stunned eyes as the water sloshes onto the floor quickly turning the normal white tile a deep red.

It takes him two strides before he’s standing at the edge of the tub, eyes wide as he refuses to believe in reality. It takes him two seconds before he’s buried up to his elbows in maroon water searching for the only thing that had ever given his life meaning after Kat threw him out. 

When his hands grasp the limp biceps of his lover and pull him from the depths and onto the soaked floor he doesn’t know what to do at first. So he sits, holding a lifeless, soaking Sonny on his lap and he cry’s the tears of a man who might of just lost everything.

He doesn’t know when he starts singing; it couldn’t have been more then a couple seconds that felt like they dragged on for eternity. The chocked sounds of the lullaby his mother used to sing him bounce off the walls and fall on deaf ears. It’s not until the verse is over that he pulls himself together for Sonny and his unborn daughter/  
Digging out his cell phone he calls 911 in hysterics as he explains the situation.

\-----

Sonny felt like he was floating in limbo. The blackness surrounded him to the point where he could see nothing, feel nothing, and smell nothing. But there was something there. A sound; a pulse. The rhythmic beat in the background reminds him of the starting baseline of many of Joel’s songs, but this one was different; to high, to slow and to steady. It chugged along at the same tempo as his heart. But it felt empty. Like it was a solo when there should have been a duet.

The lights are too bright when Sonny wakes up and he flinches as he flutters his eyelids open only to close them quickly against the harsh light. His hand moves to automatically rest over his stomach but the bump he had grown accustomed to was missing.

“Sonny, baby. I-… I’m so sorry.” Joel whispers from his chair by Sonny’s bed. Eyes blood shot and hair a mess, he looked like the picture of hell.

“Joel…” Sonny croaks as he reaches for his lover, tears beginning to rim his chocolate brown eyes. “Where’s Rain?” He asks timidly, almost afraid of the answer.

Taking the out stretched hand Joel climbs onto the bed and curls Sonny into his side as he clings to the last part of his shattered life.

“You lost so much blood. It was affecting her. They had to do a C-section. She’s in the ICU and they won’t even let me see her. They don’t know what’s wrong and they won’t tell me anything.” 

Sonny didn’t know what to say. His heart was shattering right before his very eyes and all he could do was hold on to the last piece of himself as the world tore him apart.

\---

Ten days. It took them ten days for Sonny and Rain to recover enough for him and Joel to be allowed access to the ICU to visit Rain, after the accident. She was so small and fragile when they placed her in Sonny’s arms. He was a natural when it came to holding her; automatically knowing where to put his hands, and when to rock when she became too fussy.

“Jesus, Skrillex. You’re a natural mother duck.” Joel joked, only to laugh when Sonny would reply with a typical, “Oh shut up. You’re not even funny, mang.” But he knew Sonny didn’t mean it. He was fucking hysterical.

But when it came to his turn, Joel was terrified. He had never held a child before in his life. So when Sonny passed their daughter over with a whispered, “This is your daddy, Rain.” And a smile that lit up his face as he handed the cooing infant to him, Joel knew he could do this. 

No matter how messed up the doctors said the rest of her life would be, he could do this if that meant he could see that smile on Sonny’s face for the rest of his life.


End file.
